I want money

This post is not for asking money to the readers but focuses on another debatable topic.

We (asians) belong to a society where certain rituals still prevail. The traditions I am referring is dowry. Still today in many caste or religion in Asia, dowry is taken or given at the time of marriage, in the name of donation (Kanya Dana) or in the name of ritual. In India, Kerela have highest number of literates but still this ritual is being followed. Hyderabad, a place where education level is high and a technology hub but still people there follow this ritual. I am not condemning any state or nation for following this ritual but a simple question comes to me.

Why is it necessary to give dowry?

I had once asked this question to an elderly person. In response he told, it is given to ensure that the girl gets happiness in her husband’s house. She enjoys the same pleasure which she had enjoyed at her father’s house.

Then two more questions comes to me…. Can you ensure happiness of your daughter by simply giving money, jewelry to her husband? If you want to ensure that she enjoys same pleasure she enjoyed at her father’s house then why are you allowing her to marry?

At that time I was a little girl who just opposed that reason and decided to stick on her view that this is wrong. Today I petty on this mentality. I pray God to give them some good thinking. I believe to be happy is in one’s own hand. I think happiness can’t be sold or bought from any shop. Even if you spend whole world’s money in getting happiness, you will not be able to get one single moment of happiness. Instead of giving money and your daughter to anyone, i think its better to check the virtue of the man whose going to marry your daughter.

If you say, you want to ensure that your daughter gets all the facilities you gave her when she was living with you. Then why to marry? No two house will have same environment, culture and no two people will have same habits. If you think it would be difficult for your daughter to adjust then why to marry her. When you mix sugar in milk, both have to give up their nature to unite. Same is the case in marriage. Both have to change and give up their nature to unite and live together.

Still I am looking for a reason for dowry. When a man interested in marriage says, “I want money to marry you”. Which questions should my mind ask, questions on state of mind, knowledge, potentiality. And when a person gives dowry, which question should I ask, on the stability of his mind or is he pleading groom to marry her daughter.

Why you need money? Please let me know.

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